Friday, July 2, 2010

Caring for a Chronically Ill Spouse

My mentee and friend, Chris Tatevosian, has had Multiple Sclerosis for thirty years now. Diagnosed when he was in college, he now is legally blind and spends his days in a wheel chair. Despite this, miraculously the assistance he receives from services for the blind allow him to use his computer. He co-hosts a radio show on blogtalkradio on coping with chronic pain, and is a lively and engaging host. I know. He and his co-host interviewed me on their show a month ago or so. He is relaxed, comfortable, and funny.

But it was not always like this.

It is natural, when you have a chronic illness, especially one as pernicious as MS, to become self-absorbed and self-pitying. After all, you have significant limitations that make it difficult for you to do what others take for granted, like a morning shower. If you drop something on the floor, you are unable to retrieve it yourself. And your day-to-day activities are severely limited.
In his book Life Interrupted – It’s Not All about Me, details how his preoccupation and self-absorption destroyed his first marriage. Not only that, as happens to many caregivers, his first wife gained massive amounts of weight and eventually was diagnosed with cancer herself presumably from the stress of caring for her seriously ill husband. What had begun as a story book marriage ended in divorce.

Chris details all the lessons he learned from that unfortunate experience in his book Life Interrupted – It’s Not All about Me. He has gone from being a self-pitying chronically ill man to someone who exudes kindness and love for others. He truly is a magnificent human being.

If you want to be inspired, or wish to have more information about Chris, to contact him, or to purchase his book, go to You won’t be disappointed.

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