Saturday, May 19, 2012

Why There Always Will Be Cougars

Cougars are women who date younger men. In our culture, we comment on that situation with a mixture of disdain, envy and suspicion. By contrast, it is expected that an older man will date a younger woman. A lady of a substantially younger age by a man’s side is his trophy wife or arm candy. But the reverse tends not to be true.

On my radio shows (, I interviewed a female eye surgeon who is having a dickens of a time finding a man her age or older who is single and her intellectual equal since her divorce. So she has been dating younger men out of necessity.

A little research explains why most men date older women, while women date people substantially younger then themselves.

For the past half century in the United States, there have been on average 1050 boys for each 1000 girls born each year. According to Census Bureau statistics, the number of boys compared to girls continually decreases until at the age group of 30-34 when women now outnumber men.

In the U. S. in the decade of 20 to 29 by the latest 2008 statistics, there were 623,000 more men than women. But between ages 30-39, women outnumber men by 262,000. And it just gets worse as people get older.

For a woman of 40, that means that there are not enough men to provide a partner for her and every other woman in her age group. So dating a younger man may become necessary if she choses not to be alone.

If you are a woman over 40 who is looking for a mate that is your educational equal and you have an advanced or professional degree, good luck to you. The disparity between men and women educationally is growing every year. Substantially more than half of the advanced and professional degrees are awarded to women today. So the numbers disparity will only increase.

As Safire the Uppity Blues Woman sings in her song “Middle Aged Blues Boogie”

“Well seems like men my age are all married, boring or tired…
Got to find a young man if you want to feel desired.
Now some of my friends are worried ‘bout what some people might say.
I say ‘age ain’t nothin’ but a number.' The good Lord made it that way.”

In addition to all of the factors discussed above, spending time as widow is reduced since men die sooner by at least 5 years than women. So ladies, permission granted. Get out there and find an appropriate “youngun.”

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