Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Why There Will Always Be Cougars

Cougar is the current slang term for women who date younger men. On my most recent radio show (, I interviewed a woman who has had a dickens of a time meeting a man her age or older who also is her intellectual peer. This woman is a divorced eye surgeon, and she’s seeking a male partner who has some kind of professional degree. She has not found anyone age-appropriate, so she has begun dating younger men out of necessity.

A little research explains why men date older women and women frequently date people substantially younger than themselves.

For the past half century in the United States, there have been on average 1050 boys for each 1000 girls born each year. According to Census Bureau statistics, the number of boys compared to girls continually decreases until at the age group of 30-34 when women outnumber men.

In the U. S. by ages 20 to 29, there are 623,000 more men than women. And by ages 30-39, women outnumber men by 262,000. And it just gets more challenging as people get older.

For a woman of 40, that means that there are not enough men to provide a partner for her and every other woman in her age group. So dating a younger man may become necessary if she choses not to be alone.

Men, on the other hand, seek younger partners as well, not because of demographic imperatives, but because of ego. Young and beautiful trophy brides seem to be more than happy to be seen in a BMW or Mercedes gifted to them by an older gentleman. This just makes matters more difficult for women who are their age mates.

If you are a woman over 40 and looking for a mate who is your educational and intellectual equal, good luck. The disparity between men and women educationally grows every year. Substantially more than half of the advanced and professional degrees are awarded to women today.

Besides, as Safire, the Uppity Blues Woman, sings in her song “Middle Aged Blues Boogie”:

“Well seems like men my age are all married, boring or tired…
Got to find a young man if you want to feel desired
Now some of my friends are worried ‘bout what some people might say
I say ‘age ain’t nothin’ but a number.’ The good Lord made it that way.”

In addition, the chances of spending time as widow are reduced, since men generally die sooner by at least 5 years than women. So ladies, I hereby grant permission to get out there and go find an appropriate “youngun.”

No comments: